Away from Home

For the good part of a year, I found it hard to believe that I was home. Funny, then, that I'm going to celebrate the end of that year by sleeping in a bed not my own. The difference, of course, is that for the first time in what feels like forever, a night away … Continue reading Away from Home →

On with the New

I’ve never been big on the whole New Year thing, probably because I’m a hopeless, jaded cynic. I understand the need people feel for a symbolic fresh start, and I understand the appeal of making a slew of resolutions. It’s kinda comforting, after all, to face January 1 armed with lofty goals and big ambitions. … Continue reading On with the New →

The Joy in Getting Through

While out for a coffee with my husband a few mornings ago, I realized that I inevitably feel a great sense of relief on Boxing Day, when Christmas is in the rear-view mirror and expectations are suddenly lowered. I’m certainly not the first to observe that for many people, and for various reasons, Christmas is … Continue reading The Joy in Getting Through →

Showing Off

My parents recently visited from my hometown in British Columbia. They came to spend time with their beloved daughter, obviously, but also so that my husband could go on a much-needed and well-deserved solo trip. (He did, and both he and I are grateful that he had the support and the mental space to recharge … Continue reading Showing Off →

Another Year Older, Definitely a Little Wiser

It’s my birthday! I’ve never had a particularly hard time accepting that with time comes increased age, perhaps because I’ve always felt as if I occupy a body and brain older than my own. And yes, I’m sitting in a wheelchair, admiring my latest embroidery project, drinking a Boost, digesting some pudding, and planning my … Continue reading Another Year Older, Definitely a Little Wiser →

Six Months!

Exactly six months ago, I left the hospital and came home to a new apartment and to a life that was full both of possibility and, at the same time, of uncertainty. I remember the excitement; I also remember the nerves. The future was mine to embrace or to mess up. I like to think … Continue reading Six Months! →

On My Own Two Feet

Sometimes it seems as if my recovery is proceeding at a snail’s pace—three steps forward, two and a half steps back—and then, out of the blue, I notice a cascade of changes. Friends very generously stopped by to hang out with me on Wednesday so that my husband could go to a work function. (Thanks, … Continue reading On My Own Two Feet →

A Headache

Besides a few teasers of reprieve, I had a migraine most of Wednesday and some of Thursday. Just a migraine, yes, but it sucked, as might be expected of a debilitating headache. My reaction to it certainly didn’t help matters at all. My tendency, especially over the last few months, is to jump to unproductive … Continue reading A Headache →

All I Really Want

All hail Alanis. (With that out of my system, I can now proceed.) I’ve been finding it really hard lately to accept help from PSWs. There are several reasons for this, chief among them that support workers represent, to me, what I’ve lost in terms of independence. As I’ve become increasingly capable, I’ve also become … Continue reading All I Really Want →

“Should I Be …”

As soon as I heard myself say it, I burst into the kind of self-aware laughter that’s been coming to me frequently and spontaneously as of late. I’d been obsessing about something I did a little compulsively (all of this in a very OCD manner, of course), and, as I am wont to do, I … Continue reading “Should I Be …” →