The Joy in Getting Through

While out for a coffee with my husband a few mornings ago, I realized that I inevitably feel a great sense of relief on Boxing Day, when Christmas is in the rear-view mirror and expectations are suddenly lowered.

I’m certainly not the first to observe that for many people, and for various reasons, Christmas is a difficult time. The pressure to have a picture-perfect day—to create happy memories that’ll last a lifetime—is heightened, and what’s lacking becomes uncomfortably clear. There’s a lot riding on twenty-four hours.

I guess that’s why I love the holiday season and not necessarily the holiday itself. In the darkest months of the year, it’s nice to have an excuse to engage in public displays of festivity (the lesser-known PDF). It seems almost a coincidence that this joy is tied to Christmas, which for some has become a prolonged celebration only tenuously tied to the religious observance. I like the anticipation, the preparations, the rituals. I like pouring tons of time, care, and attention into making gifts. I like writing and mailing cards. I do these things with real enjoyment and willingness.

And then December 25 rolls around, and reality is still reality; there isn’t a magical suspension of the less palatable aspects of life.

In a piece I recently wrote, I reflected on Christmases of yore. Some were better than others, but none were perfect (what a surprise!). Though I’ve learned to brace myself for bumps, big or little, I’m still taken aback when whatever goes wrong goes wrong. With the awareness that I have the tendency to conveniently forget that wishful thinking doesn’t lead to a Hallmark holiday, this year I took a different approach: expect the worst, hope for the best.

Sure enough, my husband and I were both recovering from COVID on the big day. We’re fine now, but it wasn’t the Christmas gift I wanted.

Since I’d better prepared myself and was determined to go with the flow, I was more equipped to handle a situation that was, after all, out of my control, and we managed to have a low-key but pleasant day. Still, I was relieved when it was a reasonable hour to go to sleep.

I woke up on Boxing Day enveloped in a calm that’s stayed with me. With Christmas out of the way, I can quietly celebrate life as it is and as it will be, and that, my friends, is a true miracle.